Monopoly, Tool of Satan?

Jack Chick thought Dungeons and Dragons was a tool of The Devil. But David Morgan-Mar thinks it’s Monopoly.

Do want to ruin your family? Do you? Do you want to try to have a fun afternoon of togetherness and entertainment, that devolves into mindless stupidity and tedium, tempered with nastiness, back-biting, bitching, invective, people getting upset, people getting angry at one another, and people getting bored out of their skulls just trying to finish this bloody stupid ridiculous fricking game??? Do you want something that will turn a nice day of family togetherness into the most painful thing since having wisdom teeth extracted without anaesthetic?

No? Well then for god’s sake, do not even think about Monopoly.

The game is evil. I’m sure Satan himself invented it and is sitting back laughing at how much misery it causes. If there’s a Monopoly set in your house now, go call a priest and have an exorcism performed. Burn the wretched thing.

Do not expose your kids to Monopoly. You will ruin their lives. And the lives of their families when they grow up and have kids. Break the vicious cycle now. Do not inflict this evil on future generations.

The whole thing is a rather splended rant about something which has done more to put generations of people off board games for life than any other game.

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2 Responses to Monopoly, Tool of Satan?

  1. Synthetase says:

    Goodness, it’s been years since I looked at Irregular Webcomic.

    Good rant, though. It is a terrible game.

  2. John P. says:

    My daughter plays Monopoly Streets on the Wii so she can bankrupt the auto-players without upsetting anybody. No problems.